Chemists are great problem solvers because they always have solutions.
Organic chemistry is difficult. Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.
I was trying to think of a sodium joke, but Na, I couldn't think of one.
What happens when a chemist passes away? You barium.
What do you call an acid that's a jerk? Amino acid.
I can't believe the prices of natural gases. Helium keeps going up!
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
A proton walks into the bar and asks the bartender for a $150 bottle of whiskey. The bartender asks if he's sure, and the proton responds "I'm positive."
A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a
beer?" The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."
What do you call a thief who stole too much gold? Au-full.