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The flooding usually happens in August but happened in July. It was a monthsoon.

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18 January 2024

The previous king was only a foot tall. He was a lousy king, but a great ruler.


12 May 2023

I started writing my name in cursive. It's my signature move.


8 May 2023

I used to have a job making origami but the company folded

Dad Jokes

19 December 2022

I make a lot of dad jokes but not being a parent it's a real faux pa.


30 September 2022

I practiced calligraphy then became a cake decorator. My handwriting was just icing on the cake.


17 August 2022

I used to work as an optometrist but I got fired because I lost focus.


14 August 2022

I used to be a doctor but I got fired because I lost my patience.

Scuba Diver

12 August 2022

I used work as a professional scuba diver, but I couldn't handle the pressure.

Dog Names

8 August 2022

I named my dog Whiskey because he's a hard licker.


25 June 2022

I used to work as a nighttime sniper. My job was nice, but knowing how it would all turn out was always a shot in the dark.

Helium Factory

10 November 2021

I fired someone at the helium factory today. I couldn't stand being spoken to in that tone of voice.

Bomb Squad

7 November 2021

I got fired from the bomb squad yesterday. It's a shame because I had a blast on my first day.


26 October 2021

Pregnant women are the only real body builders.


11 October 2021

What kind of street does a ghost like the best? A dead end.


8 October 2021

If you don't pay for your exorcism, will you be repossessed?