Optometrist

Origami

8 May 2023

I used to have a job making origami but the company folded

Cakes

30 September 2022

I practiced calligraphy then became a cake decorator. My handwriting was just icing on the cake.

Doctor

14 August 2022

I used to be a doctor but I got fired because I lost my patience.

Scuba Diver

12 August 2022

I used work as a professional scuba diver, but I couldn't handle the pressure.

Snipers

25 June 2022

I used to work as a nighttime sniper. My job was nice, but knowing how it would all turn out was always a shot in the dark.

Helium Factory

10 November 2021

I fired someone at the helium factory today. I couldn't stand being spoken to in that tone of voice.

Bomb Squad

7 November 2021

I got fired from the bomb squad yesterday. It's a shame because I had a blast on my first day.

Trash Collector

18 March 2021

I got a job as a garbage man, but didn't have any training. I picked it up as I went along.

Shoes

23 February 2021

I used to work at a shoe factory but got fired because I didn't put any soul into my work.

Pets

27 January 2021

I have a pet who loves to float and signal boats in the water. He's a good buoy.

Money

23 November 2020

My friend makes a million dollars a day. He works at the mint.

Financial Advisor

15 June 2020

I thought about being a financial advisor. With my background in money, it makes a lot of cents.

Keyboards

26 May 2020

I got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

Mortician

1 April 2020

How do morticians make money? They urn it.

Lock Picking

24 March 2020

I got a career through learning lock picking. It's opened up so many doors.

Optometrist

Related Puns

Origami

Cakes

Doctor

Scuba Diver

Snipers

Helium Factory

Bomb Squad

Trash Collector

Shoes

Pets

Money

Financial Advisor

Keyboards

Mortician

Lock Picking

Punatorium Merch

Hot Dog in a Hot Dog costume T-Shirt

My foot smells a smelly foot T-Shirt

Queen Royal Flush Poker T-Shirt

Battery AA Meeting

Box of batteries, free of charge

Raindrops wearing bowties - Rainbow