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Springs

David

Why was the spring so nervous? Because it was wound tight!

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Gas

1 May 2021

What gas weighs the least? Butane. It's a lighter fluid.

Nose

27 April 2021

Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it'd be a foot!

Cats

21 April 2021

Why do cats like bread? So they can loaf around the house.

Zippos

15 April 2021

What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is really heavy and the other is a little lighter.

Bagel

31 March 2021

What kind of bagels fly? A plain bagel!

Hearing

30 March 2021

What do you call a protagonist with abnormally good hearing? A Super Hearo.

Bunny

26 March 2021

Why do bunnies get mad when they're covered in warm blankets? They always become hot cross bunnies.

Karl Marx

24 March 2021

Why did Karl Marx fail his grammar class in school? He couldn't capitalize.

Lawyer

14 March 2021

What should a good lawyer wear to court? A proper lawsuit.

Art Dealer

7 March 2021

How can art dealers afford their rent? With Monet.

Farmers

1 March 2021

Why do Farmers like dubstep?  They love it when the beet drops.

Computer

27 February 2021

What  computer is really good at singing? A Dell.

Fortune Tellers

11 February 2021

Where's a fortune teller's favorite place to take a vacation? Palm Beach.

Nuclear

7 February 2021

Why do the nuclear scientists always have spouses? Because they're just so radiant!

Actors

5 February 2021

Why do actors love their job so much? It's all play.

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