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A pie in the Bahamas costs about $4 per pie, but that's because they're stolen. That's the pie rate of the Caribbean.
What kind of crime does a coffee report to the police? A mugging.
Why were the thieves putting their stolen cash with their dirty clothes at the laundry cleaners? They thought that's how you launder money.
I met a man who's name was Rob Bed. His identity must have been stolen.
The guy who had every lamp in his house stolen was delighted when it happened.
Why didn't the Pilgrims wear hats for Thanksgiving?
They had to loosen their buckles to make room for seconds!
Why didn't the Pilgrims wear hats for Thanksgiving? They had to loosen their buckles to make room for seconds!